To Take Or Not To Take

To take or not to take medicine when you have a cold; that is the question.
Since the stroke, I have tried to not take medicine for things unless I'm really really sick. I don't like putting anything in my body that can cause any side effect. I don't care if the side effect is nausea, dizziness, or sleepiness. I don't want it, don't want to risk it, don't want to have anything to do with it.
Of course, when you have a cold, that can go out the window, especially when it's a bad cold.

I remember a few months post stroke, I got the flu. Correction, I got the flu when I had tickets to see Prince and I ended up not being able to go because I had the damn flu. I MISSED PRINCE! I'm still not over that. Anywho, even though I was suffering something awful, I didn't want to take any medicine. I was so scared that something else would happen to me, something worse than the feeling I got knowing I had to miss Prince. Eventually I broke and took Tylenol and of course, nothing happened to me other than peaceful slumber and my fever breaking.

I have the same fear right now though. I have the fear that something really bad will happen. I mean, how can I not especially when there is a long list of what could  happen if you take this medication. I go through the pros and cons of what would happen if I took said pills and think about how bad I'm feeling. Is the risk worth it? Of course the answer for me is yes, Eljon. You've taking these pills before. You're fine...but wait, you took those other pills before too and you were fine. You were until you weren't. It's this banter that plays in my head every time I feel sick. The script is always the same and 6 times out of 10, I end up taking the pills. What do you think won today?

Be well.

When People Think It's Your Fault

Last night, a friend and I were talking about strokes. I mentioned someone who reached out to me who had one a few years back and the immediate reaction was: What was she doing wrong? This made me really upset. Lately, I've found that the immediate reaction to a young person having a stroke is well what did this person do wrong? Why would that be the first thing that enters your mind? Is it because the person is young? Is it because you don't see the face of stroke as the face of a young person?

As a survivor, I know this can be upsetting but the key to this train of thought is to learn from it. How can we change the minds of those who were raised with this mentality? Education is one way. Remove the stereotype or at least try to make a dent.

Last year, I saw so many advertisements on stroke and young people having stroke. I feel like they came and went and were maybe just put up for a second to quell the needs of folks like myself who have voiced an opinion. I can only hope that educating young people in Health class in High Schools will pave the way. Stroke should be part of the conversation there, not only as a health risk for their parents, but as one for themselves. With strokes on the rise for women, especially those on the pill, education has to start in the classroom for girls on the cusp of becoming sexually active. Jumping the gun? No, just preparing the youth so they can have the resources and education they need if they are ever faced with that situation. Well, there's a good idea. Who can I talk to about instituting that?

Happy World Stroke Day!

It's World Stroke Day!

Let's use this day to spread awareness about stroke and to celebrate strokies. Go on, give your favorite one a hug. It's their day too!

To everyone who I have had the pleasure of speaking/texting/meeting through unfortunate circumstance, THANK YOU! You continue to inspire me every day.

Amanda, I salute you.
Amber, I salute you.
Ava and Shana, I salute you.
Carrington, I salute you.
David, I salute you.
Elizabeth, John and Jack, I salute you.
Erin, I salute you.
Farah, I salute you.
Heidi, I salute you.
Jim, I salute you.
Jodi, I salute you.
Katie, I salute you.
Kat, I salute you.
Kiara, I salute you.
Lauren, I salute you.
Lena, I salute you.
Melissa, I salute you.
M Daniels, I salute you.
Mira WhiteGirl, I salute you.
Nicole, I salute you.
Paul, I salute you.
Rama, I salute you.
Stacy, I salute you.
Tamara, I salute you.
Tim, I salute you.

Affordable Care Act...But At What Cost?

I don't have a permanent job. I freelance. I temp. I have to pay for health insurance like so many of us. The Affordable Care Act was meant to provide QUALITY care to those in the same position as myself but it is failing. I pay over $500 a month for my coverage. For this amount, what do you think I get?
I should get a spa with my coverage. Mani pedis for free. A massage. No, for over $500 a month, I get to go to a clinic style office. I can't see my neurologist. I can't see my hematologist. I go to a clinic style office that isn't the cleanest. I see doctors who are "affiliated with ___ hospital" but I can't go to that hospital. Only two hospitals are covered in my plan. One in my borough and one in another borough where NO ONE dares go. I have to stay in the dusty musty not so clean clinic and pray I don't get sick from being in the room. I can't even see the doctor when I want. I have to wait months for an appointment to be with someone who doesn't know my history and asks more about what happened to me for selfish curiosities  than treating me.

Does this sound ok to you? Does this sound like what over $500 a month should get you or even $200 a month should get you or even ANYONE should get? Everyone has the right to clean places to be cared for. Everyone. Why is this such an issue?
My boyfriend went to see his new Primary Care doctor today. He was so excited to use his health care to be able to actually go and see a doctor and when he got there he was met with unsanitary conditions and even worse, medical waste gloves in the restroom in plain view for anyone to touch or take. What is going on here?? We're supposed to be getting better, living a healthier lifestyle but how can we when we can't even see people who will take our insurance? Hospitals like NYU are resorting to only taking corporate plans. I couldn't even see a doc there if I wanted to. Affordable Care Act participants shouldn't be made to feel like they are being swept under the rug. We pay more for insurance than people who are covered through their employment. Shouldn't we be treated like people too?

I Think I'm Ready To Share...

For those of you who don't know, I am a Playwright. I just received my MFA this past May and couldn't be happier. I started this journey post stroke never expecting that I would be part of an Inaugural Playwriting class of TWO. Sometimes I still find myself in sheer shock of how much I've learned in the past two years. I am truly grateful for getting this far and wouldn't change anything about it. I gladly take everything, the good and bad experiences, the whole package.

I've tinkered with the idea of writing a stroke play but haven't really been struck by inspiration until today. I'm pretty nervous but I'm going to face this challenge head on. I can do this. In September, I'll be applying for the EST/Sloan Project to get a grant to write this. Cross your fingers and toes for me!
This has the potential to reach a brand new audience of people and to teach others about young people and stroke.

I'm pretty excited. :)

Surviving Sandy

The Northeast went through the worst Superstorm in its history last week. Hurricane Sandy ripped through states leaving people without power, heat or hot water. While I was blessed to have a roof over my head, I lost all three of those for 5 days. There's only so much one can do by candlelight and by Day 2/3, I went a little stir crazy.

The darkness inside my apt. with candles lit.

People get sick, we all know this and we all have home remedies on how to get over things like colds, or coughs. Shots of rum and honey and lemon, a garlic necklace, etc. But what do you do when you're in a real medical emergency and have no way of getting through to anyone?
During Sandy, I couldn't help but think about how people in medical emergencies were faring. The pregnant Mothers, heart attacks and strokies out there who couldn't get in touch with the police or a hospital must have been terrified. What did they do? How did they get through it all being at home without access to medical professionals?

I cannot stress enough how important it is to have a first aid kit at home complete with all the fixins including ASPIRIN. I have gone on several rants regarding the power of aspirin. It saves lives. Please please keep a bottle of Bayer in the house in your first aid kit for times like these. You never know when you'll be in a situation like this. I certainly didn't expect the storm to be that bad and for it to cause as much destruction as it did. Be prepared!

Prepare for the unexpected!

Be In The Know

In healing and recovering from this ischemic stroke (which I feel should have a name, anyone have any suggestions?), I have been doing a lot of research because the only thing more deadly than a disease that can kill you, is a lack of knowledge about the disease that can kill you. Knowledge is power.

We put too much trust in doctors, at least that's how I feel. We look to them as a sort of higher power, tell me what's wrong with me, you have all the answers, but the truth is, they don't. In fact, through this whole journey, I have come across pretty stupid doctors to the point where I questioned the medication they were giving me and wouldn't take it until I spoke with a pharmacist and got a second opinion from my primary care doctor.  I shouldn't have to do that but maybe I should, after all, there's nothing wrong with wanting to be well informed.

When I went to the Anticoagulation clinic for the first time, the nurses had me sit down and watch a video on Coumadin in addition to explaining it to me.  While I felt a little weird sitting in a conference room watching a video all by myself, I appreciated that they wanted me to have all the info I could get my hands on. They sent me home with packets of info and made sure I was comfortable with my new regiment.

I love CNN. Seriously, addicted to the news from there (I'm a weirdo).  I just saw that they have a section called The Empowered Patient which focuses on well, doing your own research and knowing what's going on with your body.  Everyone should read this, sick or not.

Knowledge is power!

2 Weeks Vacation Just Isn't Enough

Two weeks vacay just isn't enough for me or anyone for that matter but especially me right now, yes it's about me today, haha. I feel that by living through this stroke, I have to see more, do more, travel more. I just can't do that with 10 days of vacation time a year off...I mean it's impossible. 

Oh wait, there's that little thing called money that also needs to be accounted for. Yes, money to travel. Charge it, charge it, charge it. I have always said that I don't mind going into debt to travel, and I don't. It's not like I'm buying a dress or something I'm only going to enjoy a handful of times. These are memories that I am going to make which will last me my entire life (memory don't fail me now...seriously, don't). Ok, slightly bad joke but a worry nonetheless. There are so many things to do, see, experience, touch, taste and again, not something I can do on 10 itty bitty little days off. This is why Europeans and people who live in the Caribbean probably live longer. They get, what 3 weeks off or something like that?

Now that I can fly, I want to go EVERYWHERE. My first trip is on March 4th to the beautiful island of Trinidad for Carnival. Now I know you're thinking whoa whoa whoa but rest assured, I will not be partying it up for most of my time there. I'm going to take a backseat and look at others.  I'm going to really take in everyone else singing and dancing, with new eyes. As someone who almost didn't have this chance.  I think I'm going to do that if I visit other places I usually frequent during vacation time and look at them with new eyes...good idea, right?

So much to do in 10 little days for the year. I'll have to choose wisely. But one thing is for certain, I will see everything with a new perspective. Something, I maybe didn't do, before the stroke. New eyes, new experiences, giving thanks.

The Brain: The Inside Story

Today, a coworker saw my stroke magnet on my file cabinet and was asking about the signs of a stroke and what to do if someone she knows is experiencing the same symptoms.  Many people have been asking me a lot lately about symptoms and how they should proceed when faced with an injury like that and I can't stress enough how important it is to call your doctor or 911 as soon as this happens.

Remember, the time between a moment and a minute can make all the difference in how severe your injury will be.  Never ever think that it can't happen to you just because you're young or healthy.  You can still stroke out just like anyone else.  Did you know even children have strokes? Crazy! The brain is such an unchartered territory in terms of research and we are just now learning more about it. 

I went to the Museum of Natural History this weekend with a good friend to see their exhibit on The Brain and would encourage anyone who lives in the New York area to see it as well.  It's all about, well, how the brain works and what doctors and scientists are discovering. It was very interactive and allowed you to give your own brain tests on how things effect your senses and how all your neurons work together. I'm totally butchering what you see there but if you click on the link, you'll see what I'm talking about.  It just makes you realize even more that we really don't know as much as we think we do about brain injuries. 

Interesting...