Monday, July 25, 2011

Work After Stroke

Fellow Strokies,

How have you coped with coming back to work after being on medical leave? After recovery, it may be hard to come back into the swing of things. You may not be able to do everything you once did. This can be frustrating...or it can be dumbfounding. Sometimes you may not realize that you weren't as good at doing something and it can take someone telling you that you're kind of sucking for you to pause and realize it.

Have you ever had a moment like that? What does it make you feel like?

Thursday, July 14, 2011

Deja Vu

This week was a particularly hard one at work for many reasons including people saying that I didn't work hard enough which was a pretty big jab to me. I sweat and bleed for my job...I mean obviously, I stroked out and this all got me down. I mean down down to the point where I felt sick and then, just when I didn't think I could get any lower, I had an epiphany.

The day I got the phonecall that I had to go to the hospital because I had a stroke, I was packing up some t-shirts to send to some of our field reps. I was surrounded by black shirts and empty boxes. Yesterday, I was surrounded by white shirts and empty boxes. (Wicked comparison btw, did you catch that?) Anywho, as I was packing them up, I was stressed. I was doing exactly what I did before. History was repeating itself. This was definitely an "Aha" moment. I stopped for a second, put down the shirts and again the little voice in my head said, um hello, you did this before and you ended up in ICU. Work is just what it is, work. It's not your life. It's not something that should take you over. Work is work. Live your life. So I stopped being upset for a minute, breathed and remembered everything that happened last November.

Sometimes you have to listen to the voice in your head. You have to stop. Listen to what history has taught you. Deja Vu isn't just Deja Vu as Chopra points out. It's meant to tell you you're on the right path or to make you aware of exactly what you're doing at that moment. It's a tap on the shoulder to make you think. So tomorrow, I'm taking a moment, I'm calming down. No need to always be full steam ahead. Breathe, otherwise as history shows, I might just be back in that emergency room!