*My Mom had surgery on Tuesday at NYU Hospital, the same hospital where I was admitted after my stroke. Once she was in recovery, the doctors and nurses said they were going to move her to a room so I rode up with them and her. I kept thinking about my stay at NYU when I was in the Stroke Unit and how this was such a nice hospital with courteous staff. When we were all on the elevator, I kept thinking, this all looks so familiar and then we got off on the floor where my Mom was going to be stationed. I looked up and saw a sign that said Stroke Unit and a chill went up my spine. Immediately, I asked the nurse why she was being stationed on this floor and he said that the other side of the floor was general, not the stroke unit. I didn't feel comfortable AT ALL. Here was a place I was hoping to never visit again and I was thrust into it without being prepared or given a warning. It made me so angry.
Thinking back on it, I still get uncomfortable...but why? I know I am healthy and I am not (knock on wood) going to end up back in the ICU but still, I could have done without being on that floor unexpectedly.
When my Mom realized where she was, she just smiled and nodded. Of course she had bigger things on her mind, you know, like recovering haha. She's fine btw. I stayed with her as long as she needed me but I would be lying if I didn't say that I couldn't wait to get out of there! I kept watching the clock counting down the minutes of time that seemed to be moving super slow. The door to her room was open and I had a clear view of a man walking the floor with a nurse. He must have just had a stroke and was trying to get his bearings. I watched him walk very slowly and carefully with the help of an aid. Seeing the small smile that came across his face as he started to move with more ease made my heart swell. Small victories!
The next day, I went back and I didn't have such a strong reaction to the floor. I let go of the fear I had about ending up back in that place and tried to look at that floor fondly remembering the small steps I took down that hallway almost four years ago.
*Forgive my grammar this post. I am battling a terrible cold that has rendered me quite foggy.