Memories That Stick

The rise in hospitalizations due to the variant of Covid has had me thinking a lot about my time in the hospital. Are the doctors and nurses as overwhelmed this time as when the pandemic first started? What are the age ranges they are seeing? Is the ICU where I was constantly packed? I think about the tiles on the ICU floor, the bed and the view. I think about the hallway, the nurses station and most of all, I think about the woman I shared a hospital room with when I was moved from the ICU to general. We were separated by a curtain and I never saw her but her presence was very strong. I knew she had MS. I knew she was young, probably around my age, and I knew she was just as scared to be there as I was.

We had an unspoken bond but thinking back, I wish I could have supported her. I wish I could have spoken to her and I still feel guilt about that. How strange that this feeling lingers with me almost 11 years later. I hope she's ok. I hope she's healthy.